it really sucks!

kung pwede lang icancel lahat ng networking accounts ko (but tine-treasure ko lahat ng testimonials and messages ko)
kung pwede lang wala cellphone
kung pwede lang mag-aral na walang classmate
kung pwede lang mapagpatuloy relationship w/o communication....(sigh)

mapabukid na talaga ako di na maiha!!!!!!
hinahanap ko lang kung asan ba yan TIMBUKTO kung mahanap ko yan putang-ina dun na ako titira!!!!!!

if i could cancel all my networking account..tagal ko na sana ginawa..but i teasure lahat ng messages ng comments nila (sigh)

JUst rELaX TaKe it EasY

there's nothing wrong if you take easy sa lahat ng bagay sa buhay sa goals and ambitions. i was too serious before in everything in life in my goals in ambition minamadali ko lahat but i ended up a big loser! and now im best describe as "BITTER".




i came to a certain point that i was so exhausted so tired of everything i stop working i stop making my self being pressured and starting letting go the burden in my life. so far im happy where am i right now happy and happy what im doing!

WHEN WE HOLD ON TO BETRAYAL,ANGER AND HURT

until now im still having a trouble doing the forgive and forget things.



many of us cant let go of certain hurt feelings ,holding grunge againts someone who done you wrong probably hurts you most. most of us believe that the person who hurt us should pay for pain they cause; that they deserve to be punished,not forgiven. but ,even though it may seem that a willingness to forgive lets the other person off too easy, in fact, when we hold on righteously to anger, betrayal and hurt we're the one who suffer in the long run.



bottom line: accept the pain someone has cause you, feel the anger and hurt of it one last time then conciously forgive them and wish for their happiness.

does absence makes the heart grow fonder or wander?

im here he's there. its so hard not seeing him for a months or worse,years.longdistance relationship carries higher cheating , gigantic phone bills and HECK no sex! its so hard to be with someone who is not physicaly around - it's just not feasible.imagine face-to-face relationship are already hard how much more when the other is thousands of miles away. there's also the "why bother or bakit pa" attitude. .

long distance relationship is nothing new. while some begin their relationship already apart other begin in more traditional foot: physicaly together until one of them has to leave like a grant in working abroad. when this happen its quite logical to end the relationship yet some still choose to remain together despite the distance .


we were great together to the point where people thought we were going to get married but i choose to end our relationhip (pero d nya alam tapos na kami) its not that i am weak i just wanted to spare ourselves from the hassle and hurt. its more like saving yourself from the heartbreak that's about to come "an ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure".

cruel love

may mga bagay na pilit natin gsto limutin.may mga bagay na gusto natin manatili sa atin.may mga bagay na alam mo nakakasakit na pero hinahawakan mo parin hangang sa minsan nagiging manhid na katawan mo sa sakit. minsan naman nakawala kana sa sakit pero pilit mo parin hinahanap. ganyan ang buhay may mga tao masaya makasakit sa iba may mga tao naman masaya sinasaktan ng iba. hehehe

minsan iniisip din natin bakit kailangan ka pa saktan kung mahal ka naman.? bakit kailangan mo pa pagdaan lahat ng sakit kung naging tapat ka naman.?

stupid love

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”

my LiFe

i love my life thou everything was going wrong...
yet i still love my life...
i love everything i have now
and contented everything i own.
i love my life thou im all alone...


i may have have a lonely life
but i enjoy having this.

life is great!



-lyn-

bedtime ritual

april 15,09
1:21am


here i am again crying for no reason.
i guess im just misin' someone

wIsH to meet mr. right guy

how i wish i would meet my mr. right guy
ive been waiting him for so long, i keep on searching for my mr.right guy...

who is my mr.right guy?

does he look like brod ----?
would he care for me and put me above his priorities?
would he share his moments with me rather than leave me and look for wealth?
would he accept me inside and out?
would he love me and never hurt me?


i realy cant wait the day i would sing to him this line from a song..."how did know i needed someone like you in my life......" sh!t for some reason i cant continue the lyrics it made me cry. i really wanted to meet my mr. right guy bisan "buta" basta di ak babayaan.=(



(sigh)

-lyn-

obsessive compulsive disorder

I have Obsessive compulsive disorder,i think i may have a mild case of it when it comes to particular things... ive gotten over most of them... for example...


=i checks everthing obsessively and cannot leave the house without returning several times to check if i locked doors, turned off appliances, etc.

=i also washes my hands until they are raw and sore

=I'm the type of person that when I'm doing something it HAS to be a certain way. And if I'm doing something and someone comes over to 'try to help me' I get more irritated than thankful.


I can say that I actually have stupid quirks that I do. I learned I had OCD when most of the people sorounds me says i have OCD even my family tease me na OC ako.

=I couldn't sleep because when I closed my eyes I would start obsessing over things that you and I "normally" think about like bills, tuitions, budget for the next couple of months, mga panbili ng luho etc. etc.

=I would clean during those hours that I was supposed to be sleeping and crying during the hours I was to be awake.

=I dont walk with barefoot anywhere.

=I have a hard time sitting still, especially when I look around and always see something that needs to be done.

=I am obsessive about our floors being clean, and vaccuum alot. I like everything picked up and put in it's proper place when not in use, and it drives me nuts when the house is messy.

=all of my thing are arrange properly my files everything in my room and even things in my bag.in my wallet everything is organize ,even in office my things inside my pedestal are always arrange.

=i dont use public utensils when i eat in restaurant i always request for a diposable one and sa carenderia i bring my own utensils hahaha sounds nuts! but its true.

=i dont use straw in softdrinks sometimes if i dont have choice sinisilip ko butas ng straw and hinihipan ko para kung my germs atlest na-alis ko hehe

=i always get angry to my boyfriend pag nakikita ko things nya and files nya kalat sa laptop bag niya cguro ako lang yata ng aayus ng mga gamit niya ganun cxa ka tamad.


=i also get angry with my boyfriend if i see his wallet hindi nka arrange at ang dami kalat (ex.receipts)

=i always get angry pag yung gamit was not returned in their proper place.i really hate it! kahit parents ko pinapagalitan ko pagsila ang hindi makasauli gamit.

=and i have this new obsession i dont wear clothes except white,black,green and brown other than that di ko sinusu-ot.

=i have this obssesion in writing all the thing to do all my plans everything! to elaborate this... what im talking about is my organizer na lage ko dala dala.inside this all the things i should do the next day for next week all my plans, thing to buy, everything! i also list down my ambitions and the benefiaciary if ever i get rich.there was one time acedintaly my mother read my organizer at sabi nya loka loka ako ng nabasa nya lahat ng nakasulat.even my friend nabasa nya (d ko talaga pinapabasa organizer ko pero madami pakealamera) after she read my organizer she tease me na "lurong" me.


=another thing everytime i use a glass (ex. restaurant)...girl lage yan my kasama punas ng tissue sa edge ng glass (arte noh?)

=pag nangungulangot boyfriend ko at nakita ko tinapon lng kung saan saan sh!t hahanapin ko pa talaga yun at papapulutin ko at papatapon ko pa sa trashcan yung kulangot.hahhaha so crazy!


=since i was young organizado ako. ayaw ko ng kalat everything is organize,since child mahilig na ako magligpit so no wonder kahit mga drawing book ko since 3yrs old nakatago pa. hahahha there was one time i use to keep my things sa mahiwagang baul.kahit anu ka ek-ekan then sa sobra dami ka ek-ekan ayun yung mahiwagang baul ko binahayan ng ahas hehe. hindi ko rin kaya mgtapon ng mga gamit which has sentimental value even my costumize paper doll till now nakatago pa. mga periodical exam ko and projects from grade I upto my college years nakatago pa and take note naka file yan ng maayos.


=yung family ko malimit lang pumasok sa room ko. first kc kahit wala ngsabi na my pumasok at nakilam sa things ko malalaman ko.weird but its true nalalaman ko agad if my ginalaw na gamit ko.second i always get angry pag ginalaw nla gamit ko i dont know basta ayaw ko ginagalaw gamit ko with out my consent.

=before i have this awful quirks i dont buy foods that was sold sa tabi-tabi para sakin madumi ko.example foods sold in grandstand.before i dont eat kwek-kwek hehe i dont eat bbq kung saan saan kundi sa pindoko lang kc classmate ko anak ng may-ari. i dont eat banana-q camote-q binebenta ng mga vendors outside sa school.even buko juice etc. but that was before... ng medyo napansin ko medyo alangan na classmates ko sa akin kaartehan so i learn makisama hehe sa ngayun kumakain na rin ako mga benebenta sa tabi-tabi pero not that much.


=before pag inuman lage ako my dala tissue pan punas...pan punas ng baso isang baso kc para sa amin lahat iikot if its my turn sa edge na pagiinuman ko pupunasan ko muna (hahhaha arte!)


=hehe ito nakakaloka malig ako maglinis ng tenga ko hindi ako mabubuhay ng walang cotton buds gusto kc lage malinis tenga ko about 3 to 4 cotton buds nagagamit ko everyday! as in everyday!.=)



I have to say that as I reread all of this with an empty mind, I would say the person writing this is nuts, but in reality this is my everyday life. I cannot touch things or eat foods because of contamination, so on and so forth.sometimes It comes and it goes.

I am currently having a bad day and I really look for answers to my stupid quirks.I just don't know how to overcome them, or why I have them in the first place. There seems to be no rhyme or reason behind it all. Sometimes I think I'm losing control when I'm really bad and I just don't know how to help myself.

life as a loner is not a sad life

Have you ever had those days when you feels all alone. Don't want to talk to any one and everything irritates you?
Are there times that you feel sadness without any reason why to be sad?


We don't know why it happens but it just happens. there was one time when i even cried coz i feel so lonely. then i felt that i miss my parents, my friends the old times my old friends my place everything in the past, my boyfriend then i start crying. this what we say a mystery why it happens.


will a person always feel sad when they are alone?
first to be alone because they are sad

alone not always make sadness but sadness always makes us alone.I find that sometimes I am alone because I am sad, and other times I am sad because I am alone. Then again, I also prefer many times to be alone as well. It's really a complex idea for me, aloneness. I have a hard time fitting in with a group, or feeling like I "belong". That really makes me sad. I think, over time, I have stayed more alone because not belonging has continued to make me sad. I often thought my sadness was due to being alone but i learned over time that being alone is just find. It is the sadness the was isolating me from others.But being alone a lot of times is sad, too. So for some, this is a very complex idea! sadness always makes us alone, because if we are sad the world feels like hell and there is no one cares about us, about our sadness we feel.


life as a loner is not a sad life. You are what you make up of life in your state of being alone. Afterall you are the master of your fate and the captain of your soul.


Before I used to hate being alone. I used to feel lonely or bored when I was alone. Now, I love it. sometimes we need to be alone to think about something which made us sad and thinking about our life.I love having time to be by myself and focus on me.I enjoy my quiet time, my alone time and find that sometimes. I love having time to reflect, to be able to be silent without it being uncomfortable,Being alone give you a chance to think your own thoughts, explore your own interests, dream your own dreams. Maybe you just need to smile more and to enjoy my own company.now i can be alone and perfectly happy.


always ethel

InSoMia

i cant sleep but with my distrustful eye...
i feel the cold of the wind,

the leaves rustle,

cricket noise,

lizard on our ceiling,

dogs barking...


so i choose to stay awake, its about 3:45am but still i cant sleep....

In a TigHt SpOt

march 30,09
9:37pm

here i am again crying.hate this feeling so weird being all alone. hate this feeling of fears.having no strenght to face.feels like that my hope is gone. i wanted to scream to ask the world WHY SHOULD I BE THE ONE TO SUFFER ALL THIS BURDEN???? it's really peircing me.

other people says you must experience being a looser,

to fail,

to get broken in able to grow and get matured.

GOD i cant handle this pain anymore!

TuRN BacK Times

i miss my special friend.a special friend i use to talk bout my problems my secrets bout my lovelife.i miss my friend whom i use to be with in..... concerts,gimiks,galor,ocasion and most specialy shopping.

i guez i just miss the old time...

IT society vs. real LyF society

Is I.T society connecting to real life society?
Are they use to communicate with Family and friends or becoming loners?

i admit im becoming loner because of this hi-tech gadgets.i enjoy listening music with my mp4.in office i enjoy surfing the net than talking with my co-employees,at b-house i enjoy playing games in my laptop or texting my friends in province.

if jesus came to your house

If Jesus came to your house to spend a day or two
If he came unexpectedly, I wonder what you’d do.

Ohh I know! You’ll give your nicest room to such an honor guest, and you keep assuring him you’re glad to have him there. That serving him in your home is your joy beyond compare.

But when you saw him coming would you meet him at the door, with arms out stretch in welcome to your heavenly visitors?
Or would you have to change your clothes before you let him in?
Or hide some magazines and put your missals were they have been?
Would you turn off the t.v., and hope he hadn’t heard?
And wish you hadn’t uttered the last, loud, hasty word?
Would you hide your wordy music and put some hymn word?
Could you let Jesus walk right in? Or would you rush about?

And I wonder if the savior spent a day or two on you.
Would you go right on doing the things you always do?
Would you go right on saying the things you always say?
Would life for you continue as it does from day to day?
Would your family conversation keep up its usual pace?
And would you find it hard each meal to say a table grace?
Would you sing the song you always sing, and read the books you always read?
And let him know the things on which your mind and spirit feed?
Would you take Jesus with you everywhere you’d planned to go?
Or would you maybe change your plans from just a day or two?
Would you be glad to have him meet your closest friend?
Or would you hope they’d stay away, until his visit ends?
Would you be glad to have him stay forever?
Or would you sigh with great relief, when he at last was gone?

It might be interesting to know the things that you would do if Jesus came in person to spend some time with you

how to survive in LDR

Hi, my name’s Ethel, and I’ve been in a long distance relationship with my long-term boyfriend.


The most difficult parts of a long distance relationship is handling the fact that you are not physically there with your partner. CHALLENGING AND DIFFICULT, though they may not be what we want to hear, are the words that best describe long distance relationships. not physically there with your partner. This lack of physical presence can make the whole relationship seem like an illusion. I am sure that almost every person in an LDR has wondered at some point about whether the relationship was actually real or just wishful thinking.


Trust is a major necessity if you wish to have your relationship from a distance.Being paranoid and accusing will only grow doubts(tsk...tsk...tsk..)



HERE ARE SOME TIPS I SEARCH HOW TO SURVIVE IN LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP;

1.Don't fall out of touch, even for a short time (we don't have this)

2.Get to know as much as you can about each other(we don't have this)

3.Be there when needed(sorry but he's miles away)

4.Talk about daily routines, like what you done few hours ago, what you are doing now, or what are you going to do (we don't have this)

5.Share time together on the internet.(we don't have this)

6.Be honest. If you are feeling neglected or upset about something that your partner said, speak up. (for wat?)

7.Do not turn the cell phone off unless your in a place where using cellphone is not allowed.(my cellphone pero wla silbi evn thou nka ON hahaha gabay ibaligya)

8.Be a good listener to your partner. Listen to him attentively and try to feel how he feels. In other words, don't just focus on his words but more on his feelings.(I'm willing to listen but no one tels)

9.Important dates. Always keep in mind her birthday, your anniversary, and other events which are important to your partner.(kulang D-day pa as in D!!!)

10.Prioritize. Let him know that you would rather stay at home to chat with him than go out with your friends.(huh? my ng advice skin wag magin die hard...which is which?)

11.Take interest in the country your partner is living in, like the cost of living, the place where he stay, the weather (we don't have this)





Many people in long-distance relationships say that the being away from their partner makes the time they are together special; every day they are together is like Valentine’s Day. The absence, they say, helps them to appreciate their partner more and makes the relationship stronger.Some People say in long-distance relationships tend to be more idealized and romanticized but why is it were going in the opposite side?

but It really is the best of both worlds and as exciting and romantic as when you can finally get to live in the same zip code but its impossible (sad but true) ngayon plang i can see our future...i don't want to initiate 1st or make an effort in our relationship I'm so tired come what may nalang...but if we breakup because we have less communication masasabi ko lng we reach 5yrs because of my effort and in the absence in my effort we ended in break up.which means wla cxa ka effort effort hehehe


cee yah hope you'll find my blog valuable...

LyF in MaKaTi

lyf in makati would be very boring...This is a story about a girl who chose to work in makati far from her family far from her friends.Everyday she always feel all alone no friends to talk with,no family to comfort with.

she wakes up every morning at 7am preparing to her work (wla kausap kc lahat tulog) at 8am maglalakad sa kahabaan ng makati ave.She spent her whole day in her office preparing invoices...reports etc. etc. until 9pm (wla kausap sa office sa sobra dami ngwork in short ngarag sa work) after her work she go home all alone maglalakad uli ng kahabaan ng makati ave.When she's in her bording house shes all alone again because her co bord mates is in graveyard shift.that's her daily routine...simple and so boring.




sometimes its not worthy to work just for money when your not happy...

the BaD SyD AnD the GooD SyD

everybody has its good side and bad side.except me...

meet me!!! im the person who has bad side but dont have a good side.I myself dont know wats my good side how much more other people.

but if the person die's its the only time they see its good side and forget all those bad sides.do u agree? pumunta kau sa lahat ng burol...lahat ng bukang bibig ng nakikiramay ay puro kabaitan ng tao while he/she alive.but why is it when your still alive wla makapagsabi ng good side mo kundi lahat ng makikita sayo ay ang mga mali mo.

wish i cud turn back times

i made mistakes...dcision (n dre asya) now im sufering nk mga palpak n dcisions...
i know nobody wud understand me...coz nobody knows (sigh)...
kaya wasted...WASTED!!!! WASTED!!! WASTED!!!! yan yung 2008 ko WASTED!!!
wish i cud turn back times.... mas happy p unta ak yna with no regrets.
all i can do is to
(sigh)
(sigh)
(sigh)

do long distance relationship survive..?

will we survive..?
or wud i give up....

Challenging and difficult, though they may not be what we want to hear, are the words that best describe long distance relationships. Keep in mind however, that the words are challenging and difficult, not impossible. Many people choose to give a long distance relationship a try, with the constant curiosity if it was the right decision to make and if it even stands a chance. The truth is, a long distance relationship has just as much a chance of succeeding as any other relationship!
Long Distance Relationships share the same facts as an average relationship. It involves two people who share an interest in each other?s lives, care for one another and of course have a love for each other that they hope will only continue to grow. On the other hand, a long distance relationship does have its differences as well. It takes away your ability to see each other on a frequent note, as well as the choice of being intimate whenever you desire, not to mention that there would be major trust required. Being unable to spend time together in a physical presence makes it harder to hang on to, but does not spell out doom for your relationship.
The first step is to make an agreement of what your expectations are in the relationship and how much of a commitment you are willing to give and receive. If the two of you decide to be monogamous, then it is clear that neither of you will be dating anyone else as long as your romantic relationship exists. Being clear about what you both want is extremely important, especially in a long distance relationship, in order to prevent future misunderstandings and mistakes. Do not feel afraid to tell your partner what you really need and want from him or her, you deserve the chance to speak from your heart and he or she deserves to know the truth and judge whether they can give it to you.
Trust is a major necessity if you wish to have your relationship from a distance. Without trust and honesty, the relationship is in for danger and unsuccessfulness, just as it would be any other relationship. By accepting the challenge of a long distance relationship, you also accepted the fact that you will have to have the trust and faith that your partner will not be seeing anyone else as promised. Being paranoid and accusing will only grow doubts, insecurity and tension between you and none of those three will help the relationship survive successfully.